Who knows what they really want?

VS

A number of you might think of my absence of posts as a lack of interesting things to write about.  Unfortunately that is not that case...I am just a lazy single...dedicating my weekends to rest and recuperation trying to catch up on sleep and the everyday lies that people/ health freaks feed you, to make your life 'better'.  Well...I'm letting you in on a little secret...sleeping in - on a routine body clock...does not work...weekends are spent waking at 6.30 (wow...a sleep in...), and walking around bleary eyed trying to remember what I need to get done...damn it...I always said I would never fall into the trap of doing housework on a Saturday!

Anyway...one such Saturday about a month ago I tried to update my FB photos.  Randomly an old friend/ ex-boyfriend from Intermediate (does that really count?) came online and we started talking.  Excited at seeing what he was up to and seeing that he was looking pretty fine...I was happy to reply to his FB chat.

It all started rather innocently...innocent small talk...but it soon took a WILD turn!  I mean seriously, serious WILD...he asked the question.....yes 'that' question:

"So do you think you will settle down and have kids soon?'

OMG!!!!! Seriously!!! Is this guys serious...I mean this is like the 3rd sentence we have even uttered to each other since Intermediate! 

So, what could I do...my only response way to shoot back.....

"Do you????????"

Of course, him being a real bloke (New Zealand guy....for those of you who cannot read between the lines), he shot back..."Well, not now but I'd like to meet someone and have kids in the next few years" 

OMG...and this is a guy of MY age!!!  I couldn't even get my 5 year older boyfriend of nearly 5 years of being together to let me even move in with him.....what's up with that!!!

It really got me thinking.  What the hell am I actually doing here...am I the career oriented girl that I think I am, am I escaping from something or am I just trying to figure things out?

If this real kiwi guy could man up and tell me the truth about what he wanted...plain and simple...why couldn't I actually know what I wanted.

I started thinking is this just a NZ thing?  Is it because we live in and grow up in such a small country that we tend to meet the "right" person, settle down and get married/ have kids asap...putting it down (not giving it a second thought), to the way of life we have been bought up in.  OR is it just the family we are brought up in....good morals, loving family, family values, etc, etc?

I had to man(?) up and face the truth...but what exactly is the truth?

In my minute years in the 'commitment' game...I learned a few harsh lessons....and a few not so harsh truths that took me up until a few months ago to realize. 

The only question is...what do I really want???

Is this RSG chasing the dream of career and big city living or does she really want the life she grew up with...the steady, fulfilled relationship, a house with a backyard, cafe culture, a backyard filled with sun and friends on a Sunday and the comfort of things around her?

But who can really guarantee any of these things? What kind of happiness do we really want?

Should I stay or should I go?(home)

Now that is a dilemma....

Love RSG! xo

Card Tricks

A few weeks ago, on an ill fated night, I was out at a social event with my new sports team.  Waaayyy too many drinks were had and embarrassingly enough, I was with people I hardly knew AND later I found out they put me in a taxi - hmmm so that's how I got home! Next thing I knew I woke up in my slip, a pile of clothes strewn beside the bed and the worst hangover ever- actually it can't really be classed as a hangover when you are still drunk!

As I groaned and rolled over, my hand hit my cellphone buried beneath my covers - what the hell? Next thing I discovered a business card...hmmm...whats that doing there??...oh god, oh no...vague, vague memories force their way into my cloudy head....I didnt did I??

Yep, I sure did! Drunk dialing!!!! How humiliating...not only do I have no recollection of doing it but I have no idea if I even talked to the person!!

Mortification aside...it got me thinking.  Really, in my way of thinking a business card is a HUGE fob off.  Granted I don't remember getting it...and it was probably given in between all the moshing and the next tequilla shot...but seriously, and I have never really thought about this before because I have never really cared, but every single time I have received a business card whether out on the town or purely for business purposes, I have never, ever heard from that person.  Now, I have no idea if that is saying something just about me as a person or if it really is just the boys way of FOBBING off a girl!

Then it hit me....the scene from 'He's just not that into you'.  So, for the purpose of this entry (and me being me, it really annoyed me that I couldn't remember it), of course I had to view it again to really get the idea and to remember exactly what was said.  

Guy 'I would really love to call you, do you have a card (get's hers), well here's mine....I look forward to hearing from you'

Girl - classic reaction from a movie - interrogates him about who is actually going to do the communicating first etc etc, guy is called out, and leaves thinking that the girl is a psycho.  Hang on a minute...how is that fair!

In my case obviously it was a kind of, here is my card, look forward to hearing from you sometime, you are so drunk you won't remember who I am and neither will I, receives one or a number (?) of slurred messages from a girl on his phone...thanks the lord he didn't commit to anything more!

It seems that giving the girl the business card not only is saying 'look at me and what I do - it's right there on my "business card", it also breaks the traditional way of boy contacts girl down to: "Nah, I don't need to do the chasing, lots of girls want me, here, I'll give you my "business card" and you chase me".  Hong Kong seems to be full of that kind of attitude, so shoot me if I am wrong but I am happy to view it as the way it is here.  Well, maybe not happy but 'accept' is more the right word.  

Although I am still part traditionalist in my dating ways, I am not naive to the fact that only boys should contact girls if they are interested, however, just the way it is gone about in regards to guys dealing out thier cards is very off-putting.

Needless to say, when I recieved a call from a girl claiming that I had called her at 5am (well that solves the mystery of what time I got home), I promptly denied it and made a pact, never, ever to recieve a business card on a drunken night out - let him ring because apparently in HK, business card giving is a token worth Nada!

I tell you, a RSG always learns the hard way- but we always end up laughing about it (well...most of the time anyway!)

Love RSG

P.S - I wrote this blog a few weeks ago and have not had a chance to post it yet and have since had a development. Recent Update:The other day I recieved 2 missed calls and a message on my phone.  Turns out it was this guy, asking who it was that had left messages on his WORK PHONE at 5am.  Long story short, apparently he hadn't checked his messages until then and he had no idea who I was...needless to say after a few text messages back and forth re-confirming who we were...I know for a fact that we will NOT be seeking each other out again....curse of the business card...CASE AND POINT!

In the words of Mary J.Blige

First night out since being back at work

Last school year (around May for those of you not familiar with the Asian school year), I made a big decision, that I started to try out before summer.

I decided to try to eliminate the drama in my life and get happy again - to be me again.

Cue laughter....because I sure know that, that is one tough ask and also cheesy as hell, however it has started to work.

Instead of trying to please everyone and worrying about what everyone else wanted, needed or thought, I tried to turn it around and worry about what I wanted needed and thought - about me.  I know it is strange to say, it was strange to realise, but I had never really done that before, well not intentionally anyway.

It is probably not news to most people that I have not been the most self confident girl of late and instead or wanting to burden everyone else with my insecurities and mood swings, I decided to do something about them.

I decided to find the real route of my problem:  Why am I so incredibly unhappy?

Pleasing other people and wanting people to like me 

Seriously, how stupid am I?  I have no control over that but it is something that I have always prided myself on.  Why, I have no idea!  It is the biggest mood and confidence sucker in the world, not to mention time waster.  Obviously this is what I have learnt after finally reflecting on everything - enlightened, I am not!

However this is easier said than done, as I am a person who cares about people and wants to make people happy.  I am having to learn how to identify who is actually a true friend and who is not, who I should be trying to care for/ please and who I should be wary of.  I also have found that most people do not realise what they are doing, or my personality does not just get understood or mesh with their own very well.  I am also well aware that with my lack of self confidence and mood swings, I am probably one of those people for a number of others - hence the need for change.

I am a single girl in a big city, living on her own (happily), far away from home and I should feel incredible settled, more than content with my life and happy.  It's time to eliminate the drama.

Next in line was the realization that I don't have to feel bad for not wanting to do everything I am invited to do.  I always get the guilt's (refer to pleasing everyone) and end up doing a lot of things that I don't want to do, or am just not up to doing.  I would even find myself using excuses not to come and that is just ridiculous because I am the worst liar on this entire planet - it is written all over my face - so you can imagine how that went down with people.  

I also had to figure out exactly what I actually wanted to do and with whom, which got a little unsettling and confusing.  I am still trying to work that one out.  I was even getting extremely jealous and down after I started to not go to certain things and heard about them, as I felt that I wasn't missed and they were rubbing it in my face - talk about crazy, however it was something that I had to go through to realise what exactly makes me happy. 

 I mean, how can I be 27 years old and not know what really makes me happy in my everyday life?

So weaning myself off people and standing firm in what I need for myself is something that I have started to work out and as incredibly selfish as it sounds, as long as I am not hurting anybody I am happy with my decisions and I am even starting to feel a real difference.

I am more happy in my everyday life, taking more pride in myself and especially my house (it is definitely sighing in relief at being cleaned on a regular basis), uncluttering my house and being happy with my choices.

I know I have a LONG way to go, it is very hard to change a lifetimes (well 27 years), worth of habits.

To be completely honest, I know that my life will never, ever be drama free however, doing what I have been doing has proven to me that by realising what or who is causing the drama in my life and stepping away from it or avoiding it altogether makes a happy, fun and more confident RSG.

However - I have my moments - I am still human!

Kia kaha,

Love RSG xo

Excuses and Pardons

Now I know that it has almost been a month since I have posted, however, it is not because the life of a RSG is pretty low key and boring (it has it's moments!), but because as with everyone's life, there has been a lot going on.   Mostly sleep deprived nights after the Christchurch Earthquake and getting back to teaching Year 1's how to sit still and what listening looks like.  Ahhhhhhhh......the joys of the job.

However I am back with  a vengeance and already have a few posts up my sleeve.

Get ready because the new school year has arrived, I have been in Hong Kong a year now, feel a lot more settled and ready to kick up and vary my social life A LOT!

Watch out world - or really Hong Kong in this case - you are about to experience what a RSG can do........just after I have a quiet Saturday night in!

Maybe some things never change!

Loe RSG!! xo

All the woman, who are independent, throw your hands up at me...

Or as it turns out...'turn up in south east Asia!' While on my summer holidays and leave of absence from this blog, I was lucky enough to travel to Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam.  Apart from the amazing countryside, artrocites of war and phenominal sights and people, one of the main things that I saw every where were (I sense a beyonce themed blog here), single ladies!!!!!

Obviously being a single lady myself and hoping to have a bit of a perve on ripped and muscly foreign men I was a bit put out!

Where are all the single men and when did south east Asia travelling become a haven for 'all the single ladies?'

The thing is, it wasn't just me noticing, my dad was the first to point it out saying 'I can't believe all of the woman travelling around here, all looking for a bit of something different, getting out of their comfort zones looking for adventure...what a crock of shit!'

Hmmmm, needless to say the holiday was not filled with perving. Only sickningly happy couples and herds and herds of single ladies.

Now, I am so sure they are all lovely, but what is the draw card here? Are they escaping!? Are they looking for more adventure? Why is it just girl's not boys?

The real question being are girls more into advnture than boys, especially when it comes to leaving the comfort zone of what and where they know?

All I know is that as a single girl-  I live in Asia, they were on my bucketlist and I was travelling with family.

Oh and although I loved mostly every minute of it (Hanoi, you are still in the bad books) I am definatey ready to travel more far away lands! Europe, I'll be catching you next summer!

Welcome back to a new year of being single in Hong Kong!

Love RSG xo

A lesson in becoming time wise

3 time wise girls - living it up while they can

(or pretending they are still hot/young enough to pose it up!)

As my birthday fast approaches (oh lordy, it is actually this week), I find myself not really feeling the usual feelings of excitement about it.  Partly I blame my family for telling me I am old and partly I blame my friends for telling me I am still a baby! See, no ownership of my problems and I am about to turn 27!

Being extremely busy with the business of cleaning up and tying up loose ends at work, I haven't really had time to think about my birthday, let alone the fact that in exactly 2 days I am officially on HOLIDAY!!!

Reflecting back on the year (school year), I can't help but think about the influence of Facebook and being able to see what other people are accomplishing or doing.  Most Mondays my friends can hear me cry:

'A friend from high school is engaged' OR

'An old Netball friend is pregnant' OR

'A girl I knew from T-Coll just got married'

I mean, EVERY FRIGGEN WEEK!

I can't help but wonder if this has something to do with my thoughts of impending doom, mixed with the comments of wanting a grand child and being to high maintenance or fussy to get a boyfriend OR the classic - why don't you have a boyfriend, hurry up!

Yeah - like we can all just go out and get one!  Believe me, if I could, I would....

Or would I?

Over the last few months, especially after leaving China and landing in this city (Go the Kong), I have had a few thoughts...no...let's be honest here...a lot of thoughts about having a boyfriend.  I mean, I was lucky with having an almost 5 year relationship with a guy and then dating guys in between then and now but none of them were ones that you just absolutely fancied the pants off them 'Crush style' (sounds terrible I know - I am 26, not 13 though, believe me!)

Seeing everyone else on a weekly or fortnightly basis become engaged or pregnant or married or in a relationship really took it's toll.  Groups of friends, not just one or two were posting updated statuses full of exciting news of the opposite sex, relationship statuses were being changed, photos were being posted and they weren't themselves now....no they were _______ AND ________.

Can you just hear my distraught cries from my bedroom of 'Noooooooooo, why can't my prince come? Am I the only one without a boyfriend??!'

No....you can't....well, that's probably because you know me quite well.  For those of you that REALLY know me well, you will pretty much know that I am a commitment phobe, and although I have come a long way, I have finally realised that the norm, that apparently seems to be taking over New Zealand and some parts of Australia, is just not me.\

I am just NOT the norm (this is not saying that I am special or anything...quite possibly, it is saying the opposite)

I have finally realised that I am obviously not ready for this 'time' in my life, I am not in the right place (physically and mentally), have bigger priorities to take care of first (financial and health) and don't even know where I will be after the next school year (July 2011).  How can I have all of this going on and deal with/attract a sexy hot man AND keep him?

I guess the straight forward answer is 'I can't' and although I hate to say it I guess that I have to deal with it.

I am going to have to be time wise and remind myself it's just not my time (DAMN IT! haha)

But more importantly the big lesson that I have learnt this week is that:

Realising what's right for you, might not necessarily be the norm and to embrace it!

All good in theory but I'll keep working on it!

At least I will have a big group of fantastic people around me for my birthday, have a few laughs, lovely drinks and embrace the thought that AT LEAST I AM NOT TURNING 30!

3 more years of RSG fun!

Love RSG! xo

The dreaded build up!

The lead up to a date is a horrible experience for a RSG...or should I say THIS RSG! I mean, where are all the fun times, the excitement, the getting ready, the looking perfect and it all going to plan that they show on T.V and in the movies?

After my last date here in Hongkers, you could say that I am a tad apprehensive about going on this date, which all going well, will take place this weekend.

Along with memories of my last date (yes, it is still haunting me), the body issue, the humidity and my total lack of dating skills/confidence I have definitely got my knickers in a twist!

How can you look good in 30 degree heat with 90% humidity.  Answer: you can't!!!

Picture this - getting to the venue of said date will require public transport and entering the outside air - poof goes my out of control thick hair into a frizzy humidity induced mess and nerves combined with heat and jam packed public transport produces a lovely sweaty gleam on the skin - sexy picture?...I think not!

What if we have nothing to talk about?  What if he's boring, what if he thinks I am boring? What do I do when I first see him?  What will he do?  Do I pay?  Do I order what I want or play it safe?  Do I have a few drinks? AND the list goes on!

Now I am definitely not the naive type (well, in this area anyway), and some say I am way too guarded, however, I am aware that it is out of my hands and none of this is worth worrying about and that I am making a big deal out of nothing!  However, when you are from a country that doesn't really 'do' dating and you have not been on many dates before and the ones you have been on were a disaster...once again refer to my blog...I really can't help but feel slightly apprehensive!

So, I have decided that I will treat this as just meeting someone new and getting to know a new person rather that a date, hopefully this will take the pressure off.

This just leaves the on the day preparation...well, the week build up - nails, legs, eyebrows, underwear, hair, outfit etc etc! Can anyone say rigmarole?

Believe you me, I will not change for anyone and at the end of this date if it is anther disaster I will just laugh...just like last time because at the very least it will be good material for my blog!

Wish me luck!

Love RSG! xo

Older and wider...the body issue

Being a RSG, of course I have my fair share of body issues (I can almost hear the men groan!).  Funnily enough when I was younger I never had them.  Now I am older and wider (there are many reasons for this but that's another story!), I have a HUGE issue with my 'curves', no let's put it right out there - love my curves, hate my tummy, massive boobs and oversized muffins!!!


Now, you are probably wondering why you need to know all of this! Well, it comes down to how a RSG actually feels and the actual response she gets to her body - confidence or no confidence,


Once again this RSG is about to compare her two known countries, so brace yourself...


On a trip home to NZ just this week, apart from the reason I was there for, I had a blast!!! Fun times with the family and as fate would have it fun times with the boys! From here on out this blog could go in a few directions so bear with me to see how it pans out.


While at home, in the short space of 4 days, I managed to have 3 hmmmm...what would you call them...dalliances...with young men.  All very different in age, looks, personality and definitely not from the same worlds!


Picture this......Saturday night, drive around to a friends house to catch up, after an hour or so of wine, bourbon and a little Thai food, things were getting fun.  He was getting closer on the couch, hilarious stories were being swapped and my mind started entertaining the idea that yeah...I could do this...love him to pieces...but we are really good friends, have been for years, will this change things, back and forward etc and etc.....but he is cute and yum..... next thing you know my brother rings...ops...am long overdue to be at his house. Saved by the bell!!!  No problem, off we go around the road to my brothers house where him and a few friends are having a few quiet drinks.


Next thing you know we are heading into town, at 1am, to meet up with our sister and her fling of the night. After dancing the hour away on a window seat and downing a few 'Quick F*#ks' (Excuse my French), I had decided it was a good idea to text the guy that had shown me his 'diddle' on Skype a while back and let him know I was here.  I was drunk...I could do anything!  Obviously so was he and as we kept missing each other and a few bars later it was time to hit KFC (not a good idea the next day!), and head back to watch the rugby!  The next morning and right up until I left I was receiving texts to come and pick me up, to 'hang out' and to hmmmmmmmm'.


Anyway....after saying goodnight to my friend - apparently I had decided that it was NOT a good idea - I will cut a long story short, I had a wee kissing incident with a boy which I have to admit was really nice and luckily I had the good sense(somehow) not to go further with it.  During this wee dalliance some comment was said to which he replied 
'I hate it when girls like you say stuff like that!"
Me: (in my drunken stupor, couldn't even remember what I had just said! Ops) 'What do you mean'
HIm: 'What you just said, it's stupid'
Me: 'Huh' (He repeats what I said)
Me: 'Well, I'm not wanting you to be nice, I'm just stating a fact'
Him: 'Well it's bullshit, I hate it when attractive girls like you say stuff like that'
Me: 'I'm ok, not attractive'
Him: 'Whatever, you so know you are!'


Seriously...no, no I don't, just ask anyone in Asia, no correct that...any male is Asia!  This leads me into my other experience - Hong Kong.


I don't think that t even need to go into that fateful date again, refer to the blog, a guy that I meet out on the town proceeded to not believe me that I was a Kiwi girl and then told me that in a recent study, NZ women were amongst the ugliest in the world, but oh no, he wouldn't have told me if he thought I wasn't stunning! What a load of CRAP!  In the morning of an already stated one night fling, the guy decided to comment on my body 'Oh, wow, you are really....curvy....aren't you! I mean come on!!! Is that a confidence boost or what!  There is also the obvious that living here, men have their pick of extremely skinny and fit Asian women and I have been called 'fat' by many people even by the kids at school!


So shoot me and any other RSG if we have a body issue!  Even if we do feel confident and love our bodies, these mixed reactions are whats ultimately packing the punch and serving us up a cold hard plate of reality.


My question is:


Is it the countries view or experience with women that sets their standards or views on what is an acceptable body type for a 'mate' or is it really just luck of the draw?


Because from where I am standing it's:
NZ - 1
HK - 0


I feel a move coming on and along with it a return of confidence! Anyone want to join me?


Love RSG! xo

Living the 'high life'

On a recent visit to Hong Kong with my brother, my Dad started telling me that I was living too much of the 'high life'.  Obviously I disagreed, and after he kept saying that I should come home so he could set me straight, I knew it was probably more about missing me than actually living the 'high life'.

At the time I really thought that he was wrong - the 'high life'? YEAH RIGHT!! I am the Nana of the group, I'm the one who sometimes stays at home on a Saturday night or has a quiet weekend in - how can I be living the 'high life'?

Obviously this had me thinking and the more I thought about it, the more I could see his point - he wasn't just missing me - it was kind of true - maybe even a fact - I am living the high life! However, only in the capacity of someone living their life in New Zealand - not here in Hong Kong.

Before anyone gets offended, let me explain...

I loved my life in NZ, my friend and I would finish work in the summer and if it was hot, would stop off at the river for a quick dip, pick up a few bottles of wine on the way home, chill out with the flatmates/ friends on the balcony/ front yard and then after grabbing some takeaway head out to the local bar to dance the night away to a great covers band.  The next morning worse for the wear, we would struggle out of bed around 10.30, watch the Home and Away marathon, beg our friend to get us McD's and when he told us only if we come, we hop into the car in our pj's and go through the drive through.  By Sunday night we are ready for the roast dinner with friends - a tradition - and have an early night for work the next day.  The odd occasion we would head out for dinner on a weeknight but otherwise it is a pretty quiet week.  LOVED IT!!! Miss it!!

Here in Hong Kong (where I also love my life), it is a little bit different.  If I recap this past week it would go like this - Friday - drinks with some staff members on the Pier, home by 12, get up early for a girl's weekend to Macau (grant you this doesn't happen every weekend - but as it is only an hour away it  can happen more often that not), see Kelly Clarkson in concert, lie by the pool for a few hours, attend Kelly's after party poolside (very LA), live it up in a 3000 room 5 star hotel, travel back to HK, have a quick casual dinner with a friend on Monday (impromptu) attend a dance class, Tuesday relax, Wednesday birthday drinks for a friend - head out straight from school, buy food and wine and sit on top of IFC on wicker couches enjoying the view of the harbour, Thursday (slight hangover - too many sangria jugs), show for Le French May with friends, Friday, could have been drinks for a friends birthday but was cancelled at the last minute (thank god), quiet night in, ready for a Sunday spent at school - don't ask!

The real difference is, in Hong Kong people work to all hours and don't have cars.  Most people live alone.  Hong Kong is a small city/country so is easy to get around.  We don't have front yards, few have balconies, NO ONE would swim in a river (if we had them), hung over McD's is delivered and tourists are everywhere and the Kong caters for that.  It is a major world city, however it is really a small village.  

The ease of the rubber arm bending is rife and it is VERY easy to get swayed into impromptu things, especially after a long day and they are offering half price or Happy Hour rates - first hand experience right here! AND when you are already taking the bus home - it's on the way!

Back home, prices are higher, the dollars goes nowhere and the culture is different.  Drinks at a house before going out, flatmates and outdoors with blue skies and fresh air - none of that can be had in Hong Kong.  

In Hong Kong - your social life is on display constantly to those around you - apartments are too small to have gatherings or parties so we tend to head out more to erase the solitude of our tiny apartments and seek the comfort of social outings.  No flatmates are had so the need to get out of the apartment and about in the city is a must.

So Dad I see your point, however, I have decided that I am not really living the high life just adjusting to my surroundings and adhering to the culture of Hong Kong!  

See how I wiggled my way out of that one!

Love RSG! xo

Shut up and put your money where your mouth is!!!

Or more importantly WALK the WALK!

Saturday mornings, more often than not, a friend and I get together at our local Starbucks (it's right next door and they let us wear trackies, ugg boots and look generally like we have just woken up...which we have!),and have a big catch up.  As all girl talks do, it came around to the subject of the other half of the population...animals....oops...I mean men! (Bad joke!).  This week I have had some lovely messages posted about my blog (or notes for those who read it on Facebook), and private messages sent, so our conversation turned to that.

Of course they are from some of my lovely boy friends.  I have been really blessed to have some truly great guy friends and especially guy friends that will always be there for me even now that I (or them) live so far away.  What more could a girl want? Not much really...and I really love them all to death!

I received 2 messages this week that I was really touched by.  They were really sweet and after the debacle of the last few weeks of my life, they meant heaps, so first and foremost thank you so much.  

Now brace yourself......

While discussing these lovely messages my friend bought it to my attention that really, they kind of meant nothing.

This got me thinking, the discussion then thickened and went deeper.

The messages both referred to the fact that I should come home for interested RSB/'s and that if I was in this other place then one would 'LOVE to take me out!'

My friend was like 'Come on! The argument being basically, yeah, it's easy for them to say these things when they know they are far away and the prospects of them actually doing these things or really being interested when it really comes down to it are pretty slim to none.

When I thought about it I had to agree and as the conversation went on, I soon realised that I had almost convinced myself that if I went back home then it would be easier to meet someone or have a good time dating .  Theory - it's a lot easier to meet someone in your natural environment.

*Long annoying beep* WRONG!!!  Asia is one of the worst places to live in terms of 'meeting people' or 'dating'.  Body types are all petite slim and unshapely, fantasies are lived out and men are fawned over, however life is not mostly about meeting someone.  For everyone it is different.  For me it's about feeling secure in who I am and having fun along the way striving to be the best person I can be!  

I really don't think that I can do that in NZ at the moment.  I am doing well in my career, clearing up my financials faster, living the 'high life' (thanks Dad - that's another story) and experiencing new things on a weekly, if not daily basis.

Going back to NZ is defiantly not the answer.

So boys, if you really mean what you say, you know where I am, if you want it come and get, walk the talk and all those cliches!

In the meantime I am staying put and looking forward to the next Starbies analysing session.

A word to the wise - Put your money where your mouth is - life's more fun that way!

Love RSG! xo

Putting it RIGHT out there

Last Friday - Easter Friday to be exact - I decided to take up the offer of having dinner with a guy I hadn't even met.  Risky business springs to mind but what is life without a risk and I was on a quest to try some new things in Hong Kong and thought that the worst thing that could happen is that I find a cool new spot for dinner or a new place to hang out.

So dressing up in a casual black dress (slimming of course), and after a few cheeky dutch courages with a friend, I set off, if not a little late - for my 'date'.

Apparently Swiss precision is not the best and twenty minutes later he arrived, not a problem as he had kept in contact and I had the pleasure of an Indian and Pakistan hawkers company.  However the first questionable moment came when I recieved a text stating that he was on the MTR and mentioned the station he was passing.  It was a station on the island and we were meeting at an MTR station off the island....I had no idea of the area and assummed that he did, as he had suggested it.  He also KNEW that I had no idea of the area.  Alarm bells were ringing - we are nowhere near where him or I know - is he worried we will bump into people he knows!!!??

SO, when he arrived it was nice, a quick hug,kiss on the cheek and a laugh with the vendors, then we started walking, he then asked if I was hungry and wanted food -

Me (thinking) Well, you did ask me for dinner!!!!

We began to walk in one direction and then he changed his mind and then asked me where I wanted to go, I did not mind (I was up for anything), we turned back again and the first place we past - a Chinese fast food place - he went into.

Me thinking  'Ok, no problem, must be good'

He had no idea of the place and proceeded to whine about the food, the Chinese and on top of that after ordering, when only one drink arrived (we had ordered the same), he immediately took it and started drinking it.

'Ok', I thought, 'I can handle this - it's just me, this is no big deal'

Conversation was ok at is point, a bit of a joke around, he would tell me something quite normal, I would ask a question or comment, and the he would turn around and say he was just joking about the previous statement...hmmm...ok...

The food then arrived and he had ordered a curry.  After living in China for so long I was used to the food and didn't think twice about what he had ordered and as Emil had taken me to is place before I knew what was good and ordered what I had last time.  I even told him it was good.  He tasted his dish, screwed up his nose, complained about the food, and kept going on about it.  After I was halfway through my dish, I had had enough and offered him mine.  Ofcourse he ate it - thank god.

Meanwhile, the topic of converstation had turned to conquests - I mean really!!! He told me about a girl he had gone on a date with recently, that he didn't know, and how she was really desperate.  Also how he lived at a University dorm and that visitors could not come in after 11.

Me (saying out loud) 'Oh well, look at the time, past midnight, how sad!' (It was 9!)  Said laughingly of course.  He then told me about how he had to go home to a local girls place and how her father had caught them at the door...blah, blah, blah....SERIOUSLY!!!

Previous to this, I had mentioned my brother was coming to town for the holidays and as he had previously mentioned his age, I said that they were the same age.......apparently not:

Me: 'He's 24, like you, right?'

Him: ' No, I'm 26'.

Me 'What, you're kidding, but I thought you said you were 24?'

Him 'Well no, that's because if you are over 24 you can't study overseas...mumble, mumble'

Me: 'Ok'

Him ' I'll show you - he whips out his HK ID card fumbles around with it for awhile and then shows it to me with his fingers strategically covering his birthdate (not year of course), his name first and last.

Me: (totally offended) "Are you covering all of your details? I'm not going to stalk you or anything, you don't have to worry."

Him: Laughs but does not reveal the rest of the information and quickly puts it away.

WHAT THE????

He then proceeded to tell me that he had spent a year of school at his Aunties school in America and that he had got expelled.   He told me this high faluting story about a rivalry between his mum and the aunty, ofcourse I didn't believe it and it turned out that the real story was that he had posted a picture on the internet of a girl stripping.  Apprently it was only soft porn and she deserved it, she was doing it! RIIIGHGGHHHHTTT!

Talking about my profession, he asked what age I taught and after telling him he proceeded to scoff and say:

'What, so you teach them 1,2,3,4, how easy is that!'  After I had proceeded to tell him exactly what it was that I did do and briefly explain the 7 areas of responsibility that I have on top of my teaching 1,2,3,4's he quickly shut up.

As I explained what I had been doing before moving overseas, I talked about the area I had taught in previously.

Him: 'Gangs....there are no gangs...you mean 19 year olds, how can they have kids?'

Me: 'NZ is pretty good but like any country it does have a few areas with interesting characters'

Him: 'Whatever, sure.... gangs...there is no such things as gangs....like drug dealers?....'

Me: 'Ummm, no, not quite like that...' Then I had to go and explain about exactly what Naenae life was like and what had actually happened in the 2 years I had taught there.

Him: (Dumbfounded) '...oh'

Me: 'I thought you had travelled to over 30 countires? You must have seen poor areas or evidence of it?'

Him: 'Well, I mainly go to big cities'.

Me: 'Seriously? I can't believe that...wow! (Thinking: Most of those areas ARE in big cities DUMBASS!!!! Hmmmm....travelled...I think NOT!)

Anyway after all this, giving him the benefit of the doubt, he did pay after all, we continued to an ice cream place he had previously raved about and after sharing an ice cream and me paying, I was ready to head home.

Sharing the MTR home I was happy that I could get off a stop earlier and transfer to another train, as I said I could get off at this stop -

Him: 'Oh, well.....see you later....(he looks up to see my expression)....probably not....probably see you around....but if you know of anyone looking for  blah blah blah about looking for a job!!!

YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING!!!!!!

Being who I am and being bought up the way I have been, I gave him a hug goodbye and after laughing my way home, I sent him a message to say thank you for the dinner and it was nice to do something different and good luck with job hunting.

That is what I call, wipe my hands clean, ABSOLUTE CLOSURE!!!!!

The next night, out with the girls, I saw him venturing up LKF having 'no problems with the ladies' (his exact words), and I just laughed!

At least this makes the next date less daunting, however, I think that that may be on the back burner for awhile!

The one thing that I got out of this was at least I could laugh throughout AND after!

Keep laughing....because it really can't be as bad as what this guys next date will have to put up with!

Love RSG! xoxo

Return of the mack....

...or precisely the ex!

Last weekend, sick as a dog and really feeling sorry for myself, I was cleaning my apartment, shopping up a storm and thinking...yes...thinking.  I know, I know, sometimes that is a dangerous thing for a RSG!

Since I had time to actually slow down (well was kind of forced too - as everyone was occupied by the HK Sevens), I started thinking about what I needed to do and what I hadn't done.  My thoughts strayed to my emails and letter writing.  

As I come from a family where my Dad was a 'happy surprise' a lot of my relatives are older and the internet and computer are not apart of their vocabulary, let alone their household!  My train of thought then went to David, a guy that I was seeing when I was in Wuxi and who came to visit me at Christmas a year and half ago.  

We had a great connection but as with the perks (or downfalls), of living overseas he was here for a short time and then returned home to finish his study.  We kept in contact but it was a struggle as feelings kind of got in the way and we felt it better to let things alone.  We have the odd contact every so often but I hadn't replied to his last email from a while ago and remembering, thought 'Crap', I must email, even sending a message to my school account to remember to do so.  Obviously thoughts were lead to other places in my cloudy, foggy, sickness induced brain and fond memories were thought of -it's inevitable, I am a girl after all!

Imagine my surprise, when the very next day I received an email from him, before I had even had time to send one to him, talk about in tune.  It stated that he was in Brazil (what the - he's from Germany!!), talking about spam mail that had come from my account (care of China - typical), that he only wants emails about how I am doing and that quote 'Still have you on my mind, Love David xo'.  

A year and a half later!!!!

Wow!  I mean seriously, what does one do with this information!!!???  Haven't been in contact for awhile, still thinking about each other, thinking of emailing within the same 24 hours...I mean seriously!!!!

Of course I was so excited, I mean how random!!! So I replied with a semi long email, asking about Brazil, and so many other questions, eager to hear the answers and find out what my lovely friend was up to.

Next day, around the same time as the first email: 'So, just missing you, Kiss David xoxo'

WHAT THE?? No answers to the questions just the one answer in response to them all...I guess that is just what IS going on!

BUT SERIOUSLY!! What exactly I am supposed to do with this information! ????  Of course my brain immediately starts swimming, should I see him, will we meet soon, what exactly is going on? WHAT THE? WHAT the? WHAT THE?

Of course I replied to this and to this day no reply!

Typical!!!

So, I have this phrase that I am seriously almost on my way to patenting.  My friends have even started using it a lot:

'Boys ARE dumb'

Simple I know, maybe even obvious to some, but oh so true! No matter what happens, any situation, I tell you, that phrase is definitely one that works!  This situation, is definately no different!  

Don't get me wrong, this phrase is not meant to be used as an insult, this statement can be used in many different ways - jokingly, in frustration, screamed in anger, said with a laugh...but it really is true!  And an oh so frustrating FACT.

'BOYS ARE DUMB' I am stressing to my friends (in reference to my current situation), in frustration!  I mean seriously!

Go on try it......I dare you.....apply it to any situation that you are currently experiencing (or not experiencing), even in relation to boys in your family.... it works, I tell you!!!!! 

The world really is a tricky and testing place because my god they are dumb but boy do we love them!

And I know that I am definitely number one in that respect!

Love RSG! xo